Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Protect Yourselves and Your Loved Ones From New STD

Got this from my sister-in-law - had to share!

The Center for Disease Control and Prevention has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. The disease is contracted through dangerous and high-risk behavior.

The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim and pronounced "gonna re-elect him." Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past four years. Cognitive characteristics of individuals infected include: anti-social personality disorders, delusions of grandeur with messianic overtones, extreme cognitive dissonance, inability to incorporate new information, pronounced xenophobia and paranoia, inability to accept responsibility for own actions, cowardice masked by misplaced bravado, uncontrolled facial smirking, ignorance of geography and history, tendencies towards evangelical theocracy, categorical all-or-nothing behavior.

Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed at how this destructive disease originated only a few years ago from a bush found in Texas .

7 comments:

Lola Heatherton said...

Oh, oh. I posted this PSA on The Gay Agenda today too. This must be really important, dearie!

Alicia Morgan said...

Oh, Lola, great minds think alike. If I were not straight, I'd want to bear your children!

Lola Heatherton said...

Alicia, I am busy bearing the Chicago Bears Football Team's children this year.

Yoga Korunta said...

Practice safe sex by turning off the country music to prevent making Republicans with siblings.

jurassicpork said...

Dear Alicia:

Can you get this off a toilet seat? Bill Frist tells me it's communicable through sweat and tears but he's only going by what he saw on CSPAN.

I'd appreciate an answer ASAP. Thank you.

JP

Alicia Morgan said...

Hey - if the Video Doctor sez it, you gotta believe!

jurassicpork said...

I'm almost gonna miss ole Cat Killer. The operative word being, of course, almost.